Neurotic Muse

Inspiring the grammatically challenged with wooden bats for over a century...

New Mortal Instruments FanFic Novel
I missed City of Ink too much so I came up with a new one. Haven't been sleeping. You can usually expect new chapters after long bouts of insomnia. Oy. But here you have it! City of the Bitter Son!

TITLE: City of the Bitter Son
Fandom: Mortal Instruments Series by Cassandra Clare
Rating: M, for mature language, violence, and sexual situations
Categories: Humor/Romance/Adventure, POST-COG, all canon pairings.

Summary: Clary intercepts a series of notes addressed to Jace, each foretelling one event after another. When a final note foretells Jace's death, Clary sets out into the darkest corners of New York City to find the source of the predictions and save his life. Meanwhile, Jace believes she's cheating on him and takes it out on every Downworlder he sees, making her believe the prophecy could come true at any moment. Their separate adventures lead them down the same road, to the last person they'd ever expect to see again.


Knockturn Alley

It's almost here! A lot of you have heard. If you haven't, where have you been?!


The dream is getting closer. I'm going to have a book in my hands. As of today, it will be out in 100 days. Christmas 2010.
It'll first be available for purchase on and through my author site,, which will be up in a few days.

After that, it's on to bookstores but my fans get first edition autographed copies.

THE NOVEL: How to Lose Yourself in One Year or Less
GENRE: Young Adult to Adult (ages 15 and up, ideally) in the style of Gossip Girl meets Twilight
WARNINGS: Language, discussions of sex, and some fabulously gay characters

THE STORY: When his imaginary girlfriend starts following him to class, Miles realizes that sleep deprivation is not the best way to rid oneself of temptation. He does not remember the first time he saw the real Elena, only that she was probably on the arm of his lifelong rival, Dev. He is haunted instead by the figments of her in his bed, in his car, against the wall of his studio… He is convinced that if he wants to lose the ghost, he needs to seduce the real girl, and begins a rather pathetic crusade to win the stranger’s heart.

During a disastrous encounter in an abandoned bathroom, Miles confuses dream with reality and kisses the real Elena, inadvertently sparking an affair of epic, awkward proportions. However, Elena is a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in plaid. Between her refusal to face the genetic condition that killed her mother a year ago and the Svengali-like relationship she’s developed with her almost-brother, Dev, she might as well be locked away in a tower. She didn’t intend to hurt the only men who ever cared about her. She wasn’t looking to fall in love, but she was just too caught up in the mystery to let Miles go.

Now, the closer Dev comes to finding out about them, the closer the truth behind his feud with Miles threatens to reveal itself and tear their relationship to shreds.

LLHG has been updated!

Yay! I know I've been busy and away but I haven't forgotten about you, my dears. How can I? I have a whole alternate universe swimming in my head. Actually, I should be sleeping. I have work in 6 hours. But no. Damn plot is driving me crazy. So here it is! It's up on as always. Check your emails for alerts. What can I say about the chap? Uhm, we meet Dennis, Draco gets his body back, and a few lies come out. Big lies. Enjoy!

Next chapter: "Always a Death Eater"
Some Hogwarts casualties. Draco gets some help in fighting but has a little trouble turning back again. Cute puppy moments abound.

A Return to Banners
Rainbow Stockings
So, as you've heard, I've been Photoshop-less for months. It's awful but I'm slowly getting over my addiction. I'm sorry I haven't been able to make any more banners or covers or manips. My photo business pretty much died. You can't be Photoshop-less for over a year without losing pretty much all of your repeat costumers. But, my endless Googling has finally given me a worthwhile result. Splashup! It's novice Photoshop online, without downloads. Which is pretty fucking great. I can't do my usual crazy manips but I can bring you a few visuals here and there. I'm no longer completely useless in fandom.

I'm also taking requests while I figure out how to work this thing completely so let me know if you'd care for one of my sad little banners.

My latest one is below, the first on this program so give me a break. It's pretty mediocre. Hope you like it. It should be up on Twilighted soon.
Kisses to the fans,

"Screwing Up" is back up! (Temporarily)
Screwing Up Cover

I got so many complaints that some people never got to read the end of Screwing Up that I decided I was going to give those people a holiday gift and post the chapters back up on Twilighted.Net. Yes, girls and that one guy. Screwing Up is back up! I'll probably take it down after a month or two but I'll give PLENTY of notice so you can read it. It's going to take a bit to upload in full since Twilighted needs to approve each chapter but I somewhat refuse to post it on FFnet again. I don't want to get bitched at about spam story or author alerts. Agh. There's always one kid who bitches. Anyways.

My apologies for taking it down so early in the first place. Happy holidays!


City of Ink is now complete!!!
The award-winning fic is now complete! Check it out in full on


The Mortal Instruments Trilogy
Disclaimer: All characters and original plotline belong to Cassie Clare.
Characters/Pairings: Jace/Clary (mainly), also Magnus/Alec, Simon/Izzy, Jocelyn/Luke
Rating: NC-17 for language and a few extremely descriptive sex scenes.
Genre: Angst/Smut/Romance/Comedy
Final Word Count: 49,086 / 13 Chapters

SUMMARY: Post-COG. To keep her health issues a secret from Jace, Clary takes a vow of celibacy. But how long will she last, and how far will Jace go to protect her? Sex talks with Alec, Magnus wears white, & Izzy falls in love... again.



(Official Playlist)


Modern Affairs - Part Two (The End!)
So, Modern Affairs got so many requests for a sequel that I decided to write this. As you probably know by now, the first part (based on some sad yet real life experiences) inspired the Jasper in my life to finally come to me. This part's dedicated to her. Before you ask, no the threesome never actually happened. Lol. The usual warnings apply. Enjoy!

(Forgive errors! It's not edited in the least.)



"Modern Affairs" - New ADULT One-Shot for Slash Backslash Contest!
Smell in Rain

I was inspired. What can I say? Why else would someone write 10,000-words-worth of gay porn? Lol. Uhm, I'm horribly embarrassed to post it under my usual penname but since it's based off true, personal events, I might as well. It's very much about loving more than one person at a time, something I truly believe in, and giving up the person so they'll be truly happy. A second part is working about in my head but I'll wait until after the contest ends. Story's below the cut. I'll be posting on Twilighted soon though I'll probably avoid due to content. We'll see. Comment, yes yes? 



ASR - PART SIX (Sneak Peek)
Terribly sorry that it's taking me so long to post the sixth and final chapter of A Soft Refusal. I just don't want it to end, you understand. But, I've posted a sneak preview below, about a fourth of the full chapter, so you get what's going to happen. Enjoy!

Click to read CH. 6 -- SNEAK PEEK!Collapse )

A Soft Refusal - PART FIVE
Yule Ball Dramione
So here's the big romantic climax, guys! It was supposed to be the finale but I've extended the story one more chapter. Please keep in mind that this is an M-rated story! Ye be warned.

To read PART FIVE of A SOFT REFUSAL, click here...Collapse )


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